So today’s post is going to have a bit of a twist to it. I decided to post something fun, so I’m going to do “what Jonty thinks while being ridden”. Without further ado, let’s get into this.
When you click your tongue.
Ugh human. Stop making that irritating noise. You think that’s going to make me go forward. Ugh. What a waste of time and energy!
When you say “trot on!”
As if I understand English. What do these humans expect of me? To understand their stupid languages?
When you squeeze.
Oh hey human. You think your lousy little legs are going to do anything? Oh stop annoying me, for once! You’re not going to get me forward but you’re just irritating me.
When you kick.
Blech. Stop it. Oh, well you won’t leave me alone. I’ll just have to go faster! Ugh the hate I have for these humans.
When you kick harder.
Ugh don’t kick the living daylights out of me! Fine fine I’ll go faster!
When you tap on the shoulder.
When you smack on the shoulder.
Ugh just stop annoying me.
When you kick & smack on the shoulder at the same time.
Why do you have to ride me anyway??
When you tap on the bottom.
*raise head* What do you think you’re doing human? *go faster*
When you smack on the bottom.
*pathetic little buck* Just leave me alone or get off my back!! *go faster*
When the reins are too long.
FREEDOM!! I AM FREE!! Oh wait… annoying human is still on my back, talking to the other annoying human on the ground. (instructor)
When the reins are too short.
Human, I’m NOT A DRESSAGE HORSE!!!!
When you make Jonty go in front of the lesson.
Human, you know I’m a follower. How will I become a leader? Oh hey other horse… I’m going to kick you. *tries to kick horse behind*
When someone’s cutting the grass in the field more than 2 miles away.
Human! HUMAN! THERE’S A MONSTER in that field!!! YES A MONSTER!!!! AHHHH! Take me away take me away now!!
When the horse in front is going too slow.
You see, human wants me to go. But the other human doesn’t want his horse to go. What choice do I have? *go from canter to walk*
When the horse behind is coming too close.
Human! That horse is going to eat me ahhhh!!! Oh I see human won’t do anything… *slow down and try to kick*
When the rider gets distracted.
Oh, the joy. The joy I have! In slowing down. Every second, but human does not realize.
*suddenly find himself in the middle of the arena almost at a halt*
When the rider gets nervous and does something stupid.
*lays ears back* Ugh human. Just wish I could throw you off!
Those are just some of the cool stuff that goes on during our lessons! I hope you enjoyed.
And, with that, see you guys NEXT TIME!!